I wrote the following post a couple months ago and never published it. I should have, it is good stuff! I don't feel these words as strongly today. I definitely feel more confident in my current wardrobe and life than I did when I wrote this, but I feel like this can help others - like maybe there are other people that feel this same way. So without further ado, I give you my introspective post of the week.
Sometimes I feel plain. Yesterday I was walking through the big city mall - me in my t-shirt and jeans, baby on my back as I pushed a happy yet slightly dirty two year old in a stroller - and I was catching glances from happy store clerks and young beautiful shoppers. I saw their highlights, manicures and brand new clothes. I glanced down at my half eaten nails, comfy shoes and straight hair in a very practical ponytail.
I feel plain because I am plain. I do my best to avoid sloppiness. I iron my clothes for church, brush my hair before putting it in said ponytail and try to match my clothes. If it is a special occasion (like church) I apply lipstick, eye shadow and mascara.
I miss my manicured nails, curled hair and new clothes. I miss them most when I am in the big city mall with fancy store clerks staring me down, as if saying to themselves “when I have kids I will never let myself let go like that!”
So I asked my husband if he is disappointed that I am plain and not fancy. I was hoping he would say “you are fancy. You will always be fancy in my eyes baby doll!” First, whenever a girl hopes for words from her husband’s mouth they never come out (just like a watched pot never boils - so don’t do it!). Second, who calls their wife baby doll? So of course he didn’t say that. He said - “I didn’t fall in love with a fancy girl. I fell in love with a cute bouncy blonde girl that worked at a radio station.” Tears welling up, heart melting I just smiled.
Plain is wonderful, but plain I am not. Like he said, I am bouncy! I have way too much fun playing in life to worry about being impractically fancy. I am in jeans and a t-shirt with worn in tennis shoes because anything else would be seriously uncomfortable wearing a baby. The hair is in a ponytail so I can see my toddler as I chase her around the house and push her on the tree swing. My nails are not manicured because I need my hands to be able to get dirty as I play with playdough, clean out a garbage disposal, wash poopy butts and do countless loads of laundry.
Then I asked my wonderful husband what he would do if I suddenly turned higher maintenance - curling my highlighted hair, wearing fashionable clothes and polishing my fingers. He said, “that would be weird cause that isn’t you. And it would be so annoying! You’d always be asking my opinion on how you look and I would never say the right thing.” I’ll just make it easier on him and look great everyday as plain, bouncy, happy, Annie.
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
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